Tuesday, September 8, 2009

A Dominican friend once told me...



A Dominican friend once told me, “Excuse me if this is rude, but your culture is weird.” I sometimes reflect on those words as I go throughout my “normal” daily routine. I sometimes find myself uncomfortable or uneasy just driving down the perfectly paved roads with the perfectly ordered traffic. We were in Colorado the last couple of weeks for our Debriefing and Renewal training. While there, we were able to spend some time with friends, supporters and family. One evening while we were there, we went with Caitlin’s brother and his wife to Denver and walked around in the outdoor mall strip of the downtown. Have you ever been overwhelmed and not realized it? People were talking to me and trying to carry on conversation, but I apparently wasn’t there. All I saw and heard was the homeless people, people in expensive clothes with lots of shopping bags, street performers, and guys with 12-inch spikes in their hair. This used to be all normal right? We went into a Barns and Noble bookstore and I apparently lost it. I just went on complete shut down. There were so many books! I like books. Everywhere I looked there were books, and ones I wanted to read. Books on food, health, history, poetry, literature, politics, how to books, novels, and an entire Christian section. There just wasn’t enough time, and where should I start, and really we were only there to use the bathrooms. I was brought back to earth when Caitlin asked me if I was ok. Much like my 5-week old daughter who goes right to sleep when things are and loud busy, I was over stimulated. It was a surprising reminder that although it was less than 3 years ago when we left our country, reentry will be a little more complicated than expected. My Dominican friend was right on a number of different levels; this country is weird. But not because of its structure and order, those are all wonderful things. It’s strange here because you wonder how many people know that all of our order, variety, freedom of expression, and wealth are not so normal but rather tremendous blessings compared to the rest of the world. We are our in own world. Do we even know it?

During our training in Colorado Springs, we learned that the average time period for resettling in your home culture is 4 years! We also learned and identified with the stages of a cross-cultural life. Right now we are in the “Chaos” stage, comforting right! Did you know that 50% of missionaries come back to their home culture with severe anxiety, depression, panic attacks, and thoughts of suicide? Ha! It’s good to know we’re not alone! Although I wouldn’t put anything in the “severe” category, we have experienced a good deal of most of those whether here or on the field. That’s not something you hear everyday from a missionary. In all it was a very needed week. We felt validated, understood, and comfortable talking for the very first time since we’ve been back. People were actually interested! We were also able to process the good and bad over the past two years and ponder on how we want to incorporate those things in our new life. Good quality time was spent seeking the Lord and His direction for the next adventure in our lives, and we will be excited to keep you all informed as God begins to reveal His plans for us now.

We are privileged and honored to have been the recipients of your gifts and prayers. Without all of you we could not have done the work of Lord as we did in the DR. We are confident that lives are changed and that it was a time well invested. We thank God for each of you on a regular basis, and pray that you would go on investing in expanding the kingdom through a local body, local missions, and foreign missions.

The financial details of life right now are building up faith in us. God has provided some temporary work for me right now, some remodel work at Caitlin’s parents, but life here is expensive, and our goal of starting a new life seems far away. We are blessed to be able to stay with my parents for this time but are looking forward to when we can afford our own place. Please pray that God will provide for us. Our term with Kids Alive is up at the end of September, but they have agreed to leave our account open until the end of the year. Kids Alive gives their missionaries a three-month transition period where a stipend is paid, insurance is covered, and ministry expenses are reimbursed (such as the training and travel expenses during our time in Debriefing and Renewal). Insurance is the main cost for us with just having a baby. The last two months we have received only half of our required support, leaving many costs that are out of the realm of our current income. Kids Alive will pay these costs for us as long as we have money in our support account, and right now we do not. We are grateful they have agreed to leave our account open for a few more months in hopes that some of these costs can be covered through continued giving. Please consider supporting us during this time of transition while we wait for God to put pieces together. Please pray for us that we would be strong in this time and seek Him who is our provider. It has been a pleasure having each and every one of you apart of our lives. May the Lord bless you and your household!

1 comment:

Hols said...

Oh, how I remember this feeling of walking around and being so overwhelmed that you can't even focus on one thing. The cereal aisle at Wal-mart did this to me. And then there was the dog food aisle-wow! SOOOOO MUCH stuff. Hold on to these thoughts-don't let them go. I always thought I would never forget this overwhelming feeling but now walking through Wal-mart is just like every other day. Hold on to it you guys. I'm glad you guys have each other as you go through this transition. I'll be praying for you and I'll listen any time you want to talk. :)